Gross, right?  Well YOU ARE SLEEPING ON MILLIONS of these buggers every night.  You're probably sitting on some right now!

The infamous DUST MITE...turns out this beast has been ruining my life!

For years and years I have struggled with fatigue.  I've meekly confessed to many Doctors that I believe I'm more tired than people are supposed to be.  I've learned to act energetic. I've endured round after round of antibiotics. I've suffered.

Finally, my brilliant PCP (a Nurse Practitioner who I'll gladly recommend to anyone living in Venango County), decided to send me for allergy testing in order to find the root cause of chronic sinus infections over the past three years.

Initially, the allergy Doctor didn't see any cause for concern, but probably to appease me, took some blood work.  His office called me days later and informed me that the results of that test were extremely concerning and I needed more testing STAT.  Hmm... it's never good to be on the receiving end of that phone call!

39 shots later and one very itchy arm, it was discovered that I have intense allergies.  Sure, at times throughout the year, my eyes water, my nose itches and I know I have allergies.  But to have the allergists telling me that my allergies are about as bad as they can be was quite shocking... that's something I assumed I would have noticed.

However, it turns out that allergies don't always appear as red eyes, itchy nose and sneezing.  NO...allergies can surface as extreme fatigue and frequent headaches (since my body is in constant fight mode).  Allergies can result in frequent sinus infections.  OH!

The bad news:  I'm never to enter Antique Shops or Libraries.  We need to remove every nick nack in the house (Jake is doing a happy dance).  We need all new flooring (so long carpet...eventually).  We need HEPA air filters.  We need leather furniture.  We need no animals nor upholstery nor carpet.  Travelling now comes with all kinds of hurdles as other people's homes make me very sick (which also explains why I've unconsciously avoided other people's homes the past few years).  All of the changes needed to keep me healthy are very very expensive.

The good news:  lifestyle changes can greatly improve my condition!  We've emptied our bedroom (goodbye beloved headboard) and encased our pillows and mattresses.  NIGHT AND DAY DIFFERENCE!  Now that I'm tuned into the symptoms, I've found that simply cuddling my kids on their beds causes a stuffy nose.  I'm also not supposed to clean my own house (or I suppose I could with some mega mask contraption)...that's pretty awesome justification for hiring out!  And it's crazy, but true... the few times I have swept or dusted since being clued in, I have had severe headaches after that dreaded task.  How did I never notice these correlations before?

Tonight this is on my mind as I'm suffering through my first sinus infection of the year.  I hope it stems from a cold I picked up on a recent flight, the airplane seats, the hotel mattress (though I did travel with my pillow encasement).  If not, I may need to begin weekly allergy shots... but at least now I HAVE HOPE.  Yes, HOPE that I'll feel "normal".  I also have relief, that there IS a problem, which is not good...but a relief just the same (ie I'm not crazy, antisocial or lazy!).

What advice do you have for a girl who needs to live in an allergen free bubble?

It's the most wonderful time...{record needle screeching}...WAIT ONE SECOND!  What has happened to my children?  

Over stimulation + excessive excess + constant sugar + festivities + distracted parents = MONSTER KIDS

While I admit that 99.99% of the time, my kids are sweet and 95% of the time they are well-behaved, they are certainly testing their boundaries lately!

Fortunately, I have a wealth of childhood development knowledge (well, I'm sure how much knowledge I have, but I sure put a lot of wealth into it) and know how appropriate it is for my kids to test the waters.  I also know how crucial it is to give them clear boundaries.

So yesterday, when Hazel and I were spending time with my father-in-law, she attempted to give me a sassy attitude.  She was right on, my first impulse was to put on a"ever-so-sweet-and-mild-natured" hat in front of my father-in-law.  That impulse lasted .2 seconds and I immediately addressed her behavior.  I seriously doubt my firm reaction surprised him ;)

Correcting her IN FRONT of her beloved PapPap embarrassed her which caused her to act out again (a classic "NO I WILL NOT APOLOGIZE!"), which led to a time-out, which led to a crying maniac standing on the steps to the basement (the light was on and the door to me was cracked...since basements are creepy...hey, she chose the location, I just had to use it while minimizing the basement-creepy factors). 

Like most tantrums, this one quickly ended with hugs and "I love you even when you're mad at me".  

The weekend also included some parent-free time where it sounds like my children BOTH decided to test the waters with their Grandparents at a restaurant (see above pic.  Their Grammy is a child whisperer and though she will hate that I posted this cell phone pic, I LOVE what it is showing... my wild kids about to find out that Grammy can set limits too!).

Such important life lessons.  While I don't like to upset my kids, I'd surely much rather take away a shopping trip with Daddy (their consequence from their parents in response to their behavior at the restaurant) then to see their civil rights revoked when the feel the need to test limits in adulthood.

Yes, I will raise responsible, polite citizens.  Yes, sometimes they will yell "I HATE YOU" and I will simply smile at my husband knowing that we're doing something right (my canned response to that is "I will always love you"... I don't change my sentence or the sincerity behind it until their personal attack ends.  And now we're back to the Love & Logic philosophies I shared previously.)

This parenthood thing is hard!  Which part do you find most challenging (at this phase in your life)?

Friends, I must confess something:  I AM NOT SUPER MOM.

I am adjusting to life as a full-time school counselor.  I am adjusting to life without a father.  I am adjusting to life as an Independent Consultant in a successful business (Thrive Life).  I am adjusting to life with a preschooler/ballerina.  I am adjusting to life with a 2-year-old potty trainer who wants books read to her constantly.  I am adjusting to life with a full-time student husband who is also seeking employment.  I am adjusting to the fact that suddenly my clothes don't fit and I've realized I've neglected my own health & fitness.

I am not lowering my expectations for myself, my Thrive Life business or this website, but there are a few growing pains this month and things are not where I want them to be.

I'll get there*.  Bare with me.  I love ya!


*In fact, I have some amazing smelling vanilla beans patiently waiting to be added to the three jugs of vodka I bought last month for my DIY Christmas project this month.  While I've been tempted more than once just to chug those jugs... I haven't sunk that far.  That post will appear here soon :)

We had so much fun with this party theme for Hazel's 4th Birthday!  She has always loved watching Angelina Ballerina on Netflix and when I realized that my niece who really really loves Angelina was going to be visiting a few weeks before Hazel's birthday... well, an early party was immediately planned!

My sister is one of those crafty type who throws things together without much thought or planning and everything looks amazing.  I'm one of those "copy ideas to a tee off of Pinterest" crafty types.  Together, we were a tad exuberant.  

The hardest part was deciding when to call it quits :)  We focused on shades of pink, polka dots, ballerinas & mouselings.

This month I’m sharing a fitness related post with you- but it’s not the type of fitness you’d expect. No lifting. No cardio. No sweat or special equipment required.  This is about a mental fitness – and taking a mini challenge to give yourself the gift of clarity and mental freedom.  I truly believe that a clear mind is critical to physical fitness success too. So, we’ll start with the head. 

What on earth is she talking about you ask? I’m challenging you to an Un-plugged weekend.  Why on God’s green earth would you do that? You like your phone. Your iPad keeps you happy. Your kids are quiet when the TV is on.  I get it. Believe me. I do.  But now, after my own 48 hours of being unplugged- I get the other side.  (Those Amish may be onto something yet! And I say that with the utmost respect…and also realize they can’t be offended as they don’t know what I said because well, this is an online blog so well…you get it.)  

Anyway- last week I had the bright idea that we would have an “unplugged” weekend at our house.  Let me preface by saying I don’t think my family is on a phone, iPad or in front of a screen nearly as much as we could be (kids only get 60 minutes/day) - but we are no strangers to the screen (especially me and my phone!) OK. There. Confession time. This challenge was for me. I run two businesses online so I’m on my phone/iPad a lot running those.  And while I try to use my phone when I’m not with my family- I admit that it’s on my mind likely more than it should be. SO – we unplugged. The originally idea was for just me to unplug.  I was thrilled when my husband and kids joined the “screen free/unplugged” weekend.  Here is how it went. 

Friday Night at 11:45 p.m.  

I have 15 minutes left plugged in. AH.  This is actually happening. 

Midnight Friday:

Time to unplug.  I’m still sitting on the couch uploading photos onto the computer.  I add some to facebook.  I want to finish them. Then people start to “like” the photos. I want to see what they say. AH. I didn’t get to finish what I was doing.   My sister was over and literally takes the computer away from me and turns it off.  

OK. This just got real.  

Saturday Morning: 

I wake up and get out of bed. I head to the kitchen to make my Shakeology smoothie for breakfast. Grab my iPad and sit down at the table to enjoy breakfast and checking email, facebook and my Etsy shop as I do every morning. CRAP. Unplugged time.  Sigh.  Return iPad to the kitchen counter and drink my shake.  I make a to-do list for the day. I finish my breakfast and to-do list making and am in the shower earlier than I usually am. (OK, so I may stall my mornings with my screen time. Noted but not accepted yet. This is a fluke I’m sure.) 

Husband is up and complains he can’t read the news or check the sports scores (again, on the iPad.)  He recovers from this trauma and then gets ready for the day…and actually takes less time than usual in the restroom to get ready! (Read – the score updates and news sucks some serious morning time for him. The jury is still out for me- I’m special you know!) 

Kids wake up- stumble to couch and oldest grabs remote to flip on the TV. I remind her it’s screen free/unplugged weekend.  I may as well have told her Santa Claus wasn’t real. “NOOOOOOO- why!? I want a show.  It’s the weekend.  PLEASE!? I WANT SOPHIA THE FIRST!”  The youngest chimes in “Pleeeeeaaaase!? Just one show?  Please Mommy!?”  No.  No screens this weekend.  TV turns off.  Remote is back on shelf.  It’s breakfast time.  

We sit and talk over breakfast about why we are having an unplugged weekend and what the kids want to do.  The to-do list grows with kids activities….buy rollerblades, go on a bike ride, play outside, Legos, clean up rooms, color and get the water table out.  

We shower- get dressed and we’re off for our un-plugged weekend. 

By noon on Saturday we have accomplished more in a few hours than we normally do all weekend.  The kids have cleaned their rooms (by choice). This wasn’t just a “shove it away” cleaning. This was an actual deep, get it all off the shelves, organize it, make piles of what to keep/donate/sell and then put it all away cleaning.  WOW.  The rooms look beautiful.  Piles are loaded into the car to donate to Goodwill and items are ready to list for sale.  Awesome.

In part of the cleaning, I organized the kids’ baby books and scrapbooks.  My oldest has 5 scrapbooks (she turns 6 next week. Yes. A book/year. I used to be a good mom.)  We all look through the scrapbooks and laugh and recall special moments.  The youngest gets her books and opens it and asks a question that makes my heart sink “where are all my pictures mommy?”  OUCH. Stabbed through the heart.  Parenting Fail of the year. #worstmomever.  The child has a scrapbook….but the pages aren’t…well….done.  There are photos stuffed into the photo pages.  Her sister had 2 completed and beautiful books by age 2.  The youngest, well, she has a book of photos shoved into sleeves. 

Note- this was corrected this weekend! The babybook for the oldest had its final pages completed.  Baby books end at Kindergarten. So I shed my tear, finished her book and stored it into the newly created Rubbermaid tub for such special books. And, the youngest now has 1 completed babybook, photos for the 2nd have been ordered and will be completed by the next weekend. Maybe she won’t need therapy after all.(I’m starting to think there may actually be some merit to the fact that screens are time suckers.)  

Afternoon Saturday:

By the afternoon the thought of screens was out of everyones' minds. I couldn’t even tell you where my phone was.  We had gone on a bike ride, the hubs had finished his ENTIRE to do list for the weekend (note, this is rare- that list usually carries over to the next weekend), kids rooms were spotless, floors were cleaned (not just a brief sweep- but actually cleaned, mopped, baseboards cleaned and I even switched the vacuum bag.)  We had spent time outside, oldest had a play date (those things are a lot easier to arrange when you can call someone. Instead, we walked to the friends house….asked her to play…then walked home to play.  It worked.  It was very, well, Amish. All that was missing was our horse & Buggy, but it worked).  We had dinner on the porch with family and sat around talking, laughing and enjoying one another.  Someone asked what the weather was to be like tomorrow- and everyone started to reach for the phones- then remembered “oh, we can’t.” So we just accepted “we’ll see what it is.”  On our way inside from our picnic, our oldest picked up some items from the yard- took them to their “home location” and then came inside. She did this on her own, unasked, just did it.  When we thanked her she simply said “I saw they weren’t where they belonged so I wanted to help.” Um, WHAT!?  OMG.  Call 911. My heart just stopped.  

Saturday night: 

We played a game as a family, read books together, then the kids went to bed. The kids were asleep and the hubs and I poured some wine (OK, let’s be honest- we took the bottle and a couple glasses to the porch) and sat there for a couple hours – alone- in peace- sitting, talking, drinking. No interruptions. No phone “pings”. No checking of emails or looking at the latest text or notification that buzzed.  Just us. Wow.  It was great.   The kids didn’t get out of bed to see us. They didn’t complain when we put them to bed. They went to bed, let us have our adult time and they didn’t wake until ….

Sunday morning at 9:15 a.m. That’s right. They went to bed without compliant (especially rare for the youngest), slept all night, and woke up nearly 90 minutes later than normal. WHAT!?  The kids slept in on Sunday- but so did we.  We were still asleep when we heard the kids wake up. But they didn’t come to our room. They didn’t turn on the TV. We woke when we heard the sound of laughing and Legos drawers opening. They woke up- let us sleep- and started playing with Legos together. Oh. My. Gosh.  Is this Heaven?  I’m feeling like Mother Teresa. Clearly I have provided such an environment for my kids to thrive while I lay in bed sleeping in.  

Sunday continued to amaze me with the difference from being plugged to unplugged. We went to lunch as a family.  No one asked to turn on the TV in the car.  No one asked to play a game on the phones or iPads.  We talked uninterrupted.  The kids were cooperative.  They played together.  We heard more polite manners from them than I’ve heard in a long time.  You’d have thought Recuse Nanny 911 was in the house.    

The Amish life had a few “oh my gosh- I use my phone for that too” realities such as needing to deposit a check and instead of using my phone, I actually drove to the bank and used the ATM (who knew those were still around?!)  I also needed directions and instead of the typical plugging into the phone GPS, I used a map.  Yes. Something with paper and lines and a legend.  I felt very 1985 doing so.  AAA and their trip-tiks would have been proud.  I filled in our weekly family “fridge calendar” and when I asked the hubs his schedule, we realized that it was on his phone and I’d have to wait until Monday to find out his details.  When driving, I believe I was a better, more focused driver.  I knew the phone was at home so I wasn’t tempted to call, text or use it at all. I just- well- drove (novel concept huh?!) 

Why did this work? Well, despite Steve Jobs best efforts….life beyond the screen is pretty awesome!  

Everyone was fully present with one another.  No one was distracted with a screen in the face. No one heard “Just a minute while I check this”. No one was interrupted mid sentence by an incoming text.  We were focused and present. 
The kids didn’t have any influence other than our family. They didn’t have any behavior they saw on TV or movies. They didn’t have an excuse to tune out and play brain dead while a box entertained them.  
Hubs and I are always very busy- but were so much more productive unplugged. We didn’t have the option or planned distraction to plop on the couch and do nothing, to watch hours f sporting events (even if it was a true interest), or flip channels until something caught our attention. 
The kids didn’t see us tune out. They saw us active and making steps toward goals at the house. They did the same. 

And on Monday morning when the phones, iPads, computer, remotes were allowed back in our lives….they still weren’t reached for as quickly as they were last week. I had 64 texts and 50 emails to review. But you know what- the world was just fine without me checking those messages over the weekend.  It was still spinning without me.  So much for my self esteem.  While we did check our emails, texts, pings, etc.- the feeling of being unplugged was definitely on my mind and one I am going to try to channel more on a daily basis. 

So…..now that you’re done reading on a SCREEN that is likely PLUGGED IN or CHARGED somehow….go unplug. You may be amazed just how much you learn! I was. 

Like most things in life, there is not one “right” way to build a campfire.  Some of us might use flint (my brother-in-law) while some of us might use jet fuel (my father).  I fall somewhere in the middle and have successfully started many fires...even in the rain!  

At summer camp (www.lutherlyn.com), I was taught the “dead, down & brown”rule.  This rule can probably apply to other, more unpleasant things (anyone else picturing decaying groundhogs on the side of the road?  Well, now you are!), but for this particular lesson... let’s apply it to wood :)  You absolutely do not want to attempt to burn twigs pried off of trees, rotting/wet limbs, nor recently fallen branches.  You might succeed in getting a lot of smoke, but not much fire!

Ideally, you will find branches that fell awhile ago, but are not completely touching the ground and therefore moist.  One exception is the small, dead twigs at the base of pine trees!  Snap those babies off for great tinder.  

You need 3 types of wood:

Screen-Free Week starts tomorrow (April 29th) and runs through May 9th.  Last year, I had to resort to unplugging our TV and putting it in a closet for a week!  It's just so so so easy to turn it on for a wee-bit while I enjoy my morning coffee or send some post-work emails or veg on facebook after dinner.  While it's easy to snub the statistic that the average preschooler watches a staggering 32 hours of tv a week, when I sit up and take inventory, I begin to squirm uncomfortably.

While I will still need to work at my computer, my family will otherwise be powering down this week.  I have a STACK of magazines that I've ignored since receiving my Kindle Fire and heaven knows, my girls have an awesome new selection of books (go here for our recent toddler book wish list that has been mostly fulfilled!) that need read a few hundred more times until I have them completely memorized :)

Here are the TOP 10 TV alternatives that we'll be indulging in this week:

1. FAMILY GARDENING!  My husband is an avid gardener and our girls LOVE helping out.  Truth be told, I often use that time for my own recreational screen time.  This week, I'll be digging in the dirt with them and most likely strengthening my marriage while I do it :)  Double win!  Head here for my woojr.com post about toddler friendly gardening.
2. BOOKS!  I LOVE to read, but sometimes it takes a little energy burst to read with my kids.  Once we start, I always enjoy it and this week we'll work our way through our stacks and stacks of books!
3. NATURE HIKES!  It's spring in our neck of the woods and this week I'll let the kids set the pace and direction.  So often, we walk with determination and purpose and miss the delicate buds poking through the fallen leaves or the newly arrived bird calls.  One of my favorite activities:  Wrap your child's wrist with masking tape (sticky side out) and let them make their own bracelet!

  4.  MAKE PINECONE BIRD FEEDERS!  If you live in an area where birds are finally returning to, take some time to 
       bird watch AND why not enjoy a simple craft as a welcome home gift to the birds?
  5.  DO NOTHING!  Is it cheating to include this one?  Well, I cannot say enough about giving your kids the gift of  
       freedom (even if it's boredom).  Just this past Saturday, I let my almost 4 year old have some SOLO TIME 
       outside (the gift of living in the country).  She enjoyed swinging, walking, dancing, talking & singing, but each time    
       she caught me checking on her, she would STOP and NEED ME.
  6.  MAKE A PINTEREST BUCKET LIST!  Yes, you'll need a little screen time to make this list and read the 
      directions, but how many of us "Pin" awesome kids crafts, but never get around to doing them?  THIS IS THE 
      WEEK! Here is my "to do with kids" pinboard.
  7.  VISIT LOCAL ATTRACTIONS.  The Public Library and perhaps the local science & history museum are on our 
       agenda this week.  We don't have a library card (we live out of area), but we can still enjoy the kids area and 
       enjoy reading new books & playing new games!  We're also going to Camp Lutherlyn's FREE Camp Blast event  
       on Sunday.  If you live near Butler, PA, I highly recommend attending (think horse rides, camp games, fishing, 
       sing alongs, food, wagon rides, campfires, etc!!
  8.  COOK TOGETHER.  This is one of the times I rely on the TV the most... to cook in peace :)  However, my girls 
       LOVE helping with dinner preparations!  They're especially good with pizza toppings and {destroying} cookie cut-
       outs. Time to pull out the sugar cookie dough I froze over the (gulp) Christmas holidays!
  9.  SCHEDULE A PLAY DATE!  There are so many special people in our lives that we don't see regularly.  This 
       week, I'd love to treat my girls to a play date with a friend (or two) they don't see often.
  10. CREATE YOUR OWN PLAYS.  Whether it's with puppets, capes or drawings, grow your imagination and take 
        your kids on a fanciful journey.  My husband is especially good with story telling and our almost 4 year old has 
        picked up on the skill.  The stories she tells are AWESOME... wait till she discovers that we can ACT THEM 
        OUT!

Whether it's one-hour, one-day, or one-week, please join me in being SCREEN FREE!  

TELL ME:  What activities will be replacing your screen time?